ter, and heels. right then, tom made up his mind he was going to

fuck simon's wife again, even if he had to go over to their house like

jack did.

"bob, will you tell him i need those shot glasses back. i only got

about five clean ones left!" the owner of the small tavern pleaded.

"hear that, simon? don's cutting you off. time to go."

"i'm not getting in that fucking boat again!" simon shouted without

even looking up.

"what's your position on cars?"

back and forth they went, bob trying to get simon to leave, and simon

trying to get bob to stay and drink with him. in the end, simon won, but

only after bob made him promise to eat something. bob had seen his best

friend like this before, and knew all to well how belligerent he could

get. don came over to the table then and asked, "can i take these away

now?"

"shit, it's about time!" simon said.

playfully, and not too hard, don hit simon over the head with a tray

he was carrying.

"what are you doing here anyway?" simon finally asked bob.

"remember, you and mel were suppose to come over for dinner tonight.

well, if mohammed won't go to the mountain, then the mountain will come

to mohammed." bob said as melisa and bob's wife sue walked in.

simon became very quiet when the two women sat down to join them.

while sue and melisa discussed the differences between life in the woods

and big city, bob studied his friend. something was troubling him, and

had been all day. he then noticed that every time simon looked at

melisa, he did so with a scowl. they must be fighting, he thought, and

sensed that things could get ugly, especially considering how much simon

had to drink already. when don came over to their table again, bob

promptly ordered steak dinners for everyone. from past experience, he

knew this wouldn't change simon's mood, but it would sober him up and

make him more reasonable. melisa and sue continued to talk up a storm

during dinner and, thankfully, simon didn't argue when melisa suggested

he quit drinking, at least until they finished eating.

the food did help. this, plus making him drink several cups of coffee

after dinner and splashing his face with ice-cold water in the small

bathroom, had simon coherent now. he could focus his eyes, and knew

where he was and who was with him. when he talked, his speech wasn't

slurred and he could be understood.

"you okay, pal?" bob asked before they went to rejoin their wives.

"yeah, i'm doing better, thanks. almost like old times, huh? me

getting fucked up, and you coming to the rescue." simon said as he dried

his face.

"don't you think it's about time you stopped doing this kind of shit?"

"i guess so."

"are you and melisa getting along okay?"

"boy, you sure are subtle." simon answered.

"come on, don't play any of your horse shit games, simon! i've seen

the dirty looks you've been giving her. fuck, you think i'm blind!"

"hey, i can handle it."

"look, we've been friends a long time. if you need someone to talk to,

i'll listen. but, if you and melisa are having problems, keep it to

yourselves. quit making other people around you feel uncomfortable!"

"i'm feeling better and i'll behave. now, why don't we go back out

there and have a good time."

while bob and simon were in the bathroom, two other couples had come

in. they were still talking with melisa and sue when the men returned,

so bob invited them to sit down. within five minutes, he regretted this

and was ready to pull his hair out. after just straightening out simon

in the bathroom, melisa started acting up, and she was a lot more vocal

about it than simon had been.

sitting at their large table were eight people, simon and melisa, bob

and his wife sue, simon's former girlfriend janice and her husband tom

(the stranger melisa fucked last night), and jack (the man melisa fucked

this morning) and his wife mary.

the verbal assaults began when simon went over and sat down next to

janice, leaving melisa to sit between tom and jack. she was very quiet

for awhile, but it didn't last long.

"so, janice, i hear you two were quite the couple... some time ago."

melisa said in the cattiest voice she had.

"i believe we still look good... together." janice replied, making the

same pause for effect that melisa had.

everyone now knew that melisa and janice didn't like each other. simon

could tell melisa was jealous of the tall brunette, and loved it. janice

knew she was making simon's wife jealous, and she loved it too. this set

the stage for an evening none of them would forget. after the two women

tired of making snide remarks about each other, with melisa coming out

on the short end of most of them, they began a more open and direct

battle.

melisa started it by asking tom to play some music on the jukebox so

they could dance. while giving both janice and simon a watch-what-i-do-

next look, she grabbed tom's arm and got u